When you first met, your partner couldn’t keep their hands off of you. Now, they can’t keep their hands off of the gaming console.  

If their video game is getting in the way of your relationship, let’s face it: it is a problem. In fact, the World Health Organization officially recognizes “gaming disorder” as a mental health condition

Here are 5 compassionate ways to address the problem. 

1. Figure Out Why They’re So Obsessed. Believe it or not, the average gamer is 34 years old, and 60% of Americans play video games daily. Most people play video games for three reasons: to escape daily life, as a social outlet (i.e., playing with friends, either virtually or in the same room together), and to collect in-game rewards – which satisfies the same reward pathways in the brain that eating a cookie does. 
2. Acknowledge That Gaming Is a Hobby, Not the Enemy. It’s encouraged to have separate hobbies in a relationship. That said, their hobby shouldn’t prevent them from doing the dishes or showing up to your mother’s house for dinner on time, the same way yours doesn’t. If you can think of gaming as a hobby, not some annoying habit you have to deal with, it will be easier to talk about the problem from an objective place, and they’re less likely to feel like they’re being nagged or put on the defense. 
3. Start the Conversation  After  They’ve Finished Gaming. We know, it’s tempting to voice your opinions as soon as they start playing. (“Ugh, do you really have to play that now? I need you to do something else for me.”) Instead, wait until later, when neither of you are distracted, and you can have a calm, face-to-face chat about it. 
4. Suggest a Compromise. I hate to break it to you, but “stop playing video games forever” isn’t a fair request. Sorry. Instead, communicate how you feel and clearly outline what could help you feel better. Find a compromise that you both feel is fair.
5. Know When to Find Professional Help. If your partner’s video game playing has veered into full-blown addiction (think: they’re frequently staying up all night playing; it’s getting in the way of work; or they never leave the house on weekends), it’s time to call in some extra support. Consult a couples’ counselor or psychologist.